Proud to Blog for Mental Health in 2015!

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I pledge my commitment to the Blog for Mental Health 2015 Project. I will blog about mental health topics not only for myself, but for others. By displaying this badge, I show my pride, dedication, and acceptance for mental health. I use this to promote mental health education in the struggle to erase stigma.

I stumbled across this on one of my rare sojourns into looking at what other people blog about on WordPress.

Its not that I’m not interested in what other people have to say,  its just that I’m really busy and don’t have a lot of time when I’m sitting at my computer.

My followers,  and those that know me personally know that I sometimes struggle with mental health issues and sometimes I talk about it here.

I’ve never regretted it when I have.

But often I won’t,  for various reasons that are usually not good ones.

I will continue to do so,   in hopes that someone who is struggling may read about my experience and realize that they are not alone.

If you’re interested in joining the cause, here’s a link:


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Originally posted on Homo-Vizion:

Loved this so wanted to share!


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I’m waiting in the dark.

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Hey….any one reading this…..I found this post…a cry for help, only an hour old.

Take a moment and send the author a comment, letting them know they are not alone…

Originally posted on Butterfly Markings:

I wish better at telling people how i feel

I feel really low today. I don’t have any support and I don’t know what to do.

Just going to try to get through the next few hours but it’s so hard.

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Blogging for Mental Health

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This is a wonderful idea!

Originally posted on Read Write Live:

The Official Blog for Mental Health Project asks each person who has had an experience with mental illness, either with themselves or through a loved one, to write a blog post about it. The objective is to pull mental illness out of the closet and change the stigma attached to it so more people who need help, will reach out and receive help. For more information regarding this challenge, please go to their website.


I have had a first hand experience of mental illness, in other words depression. I have been the ‘melancholic’ kinds ever since childhood. I was asked to ‘lighten up’ and ‘stop being moody’. The ‘sad’ days would happen in response to an event or because of an unfulfilled expectation. Then, for the next few years, I would feel unhappy at regular intervals. Every few days, I would go off food and feel lethargic and tired.

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RTOD: Are you a communist?

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If you dislike a group of people,  based on their community…does that make you a communist?

Stephen Harper meets the dictionary definition of a terrorist (seriously)

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‘the use of violence and intimidation in the pursuit of political aims.’

When you Google Terrorism Definition,  that’s what pops up.

When looking for how terrorism is defined within Canada’s Criminal Code,  you will see references to section 83.01.

Here’s a link to the Ministry of Justice’s page explaining how terrorism is defined (warning, the author is unfamiliar with the use of paragraphs):

For those of you who don’t want to sort through the rambling,  here’s the relevant part (with the really relevant stuff bolded)

In Canada, section 83.01 of the Criminal Code[1] defines terrorism as an act committed “in whole or in part for a political, religious or ideological purpose, objective or cause” with the intention of intimidating the public “…with regard to its security, including its economic security, or compelling a person, a government or a domestic or an international organization to do or to refrain from doing any act.”

So,  let’s break this down and look at some of the policies and actions taken by The Harper Government (who apparently don’t consider themselves the Government of Canada) that were clearly meant to intimidate people to further a political purpose, objective, or cause.

One of the things that no one can argue with is that The Harper Government is uncomfortable with scientists who come out with findings that contradict their policies.

In this piece on The Huffington Post,   you’ll see that Harper decided to close the Office of the National Science Advisor,  stating that its head Arthur Carty,  had decided to retire.

As you read further,  you’ll see that while testifying in front of the Standing Committee on Industry, Science and Technology,  that Mr. Carty categorically stated that his decision to retire was made after  he was told that his office was being eliminated.

You’ll also see that during his testimony,  instead of talking about science,  Carty was grilled about expense reports.

The message was clear…. “You disagree with us,  and we’ll drag you through the mud!”

Clearly intimidation towards a political goal.    In other words….it clearly meets the definition of terrorism as laid out in Canada’s Criminal Code.

One might argue about the lack of harm.

I would point out that in muzzling scientists,  there is potential for great harm,  economic, environmental, social…

Here’s a whole series of articles about The Harper Government trying to stifle science

My next point proves that The Harper Government is more than willing to fire you,  if you’re a government employee whose job is doing research and analysis,   and the fruits of your labour do not align with the Conservative Party of Canada’s party line..

The Harper Govt slashed funding for the Justice Department’s research division when it became clear that their research would run counter to what Harper has been trying to sell in his efforts to push his “Law and Order” agenda.

In this article on,  Michael Spratt talks about the folly and fail in Harper’s Crime Agenda.

This is the bit where he talks about what happens when you’re a government employee who disagrees with the Harper reality:

That the Conservatives are indifferent to the pursuit of justice is something demonstrated by their actions, not their words. They cut the Department of Justice’s research budget by $1.2 million. According to an internal government report, the Justice Department’s research budget was slashed just as an internal report for the deputy minister was warning its findings “may run contrary to government direction” and have “at times left the impression that research is undermining government decisions” and is not “aligned with government or departmental priorities.”

Why stop at suppressing the dissenting opinions of the experts when you can stifle them altogether?

Ralph Surrette on makes direct mention in paragraph 3, here.

This is clearly intimidation of the highest degree….threatening the financial security to influence behaviour to further a political goal.

The harm here should be obvious.

With the Harper Government’s penchant for passing tough on crime laws without proper review,  we end up with a bunch of laws that end up wasting thousands upon thousands of tax payer dollars in Supreme Court challenges….where the government usually loses…badly.

The true terror here is imagine being Joe Average,  and arrested for one of these crimes and facing legal bills that could amount to hundreds of thousands of dollars….or doing your time and being labeled a criminal….until someone with the resources to fight it to the Supreme Court gets charged with the same thing…

Harper’s reign of terror extends beyond the government payroll.

For the past while,  the Canadian Revenue Agency has been reviewing the status of registered charities looking for evidence of ‘political activity‘.

Here’s a bunch of stories that talk about it.

To date,  I haven’t seen any evidence of charities that are supportive of Harper and his policies that have been audited, let alone had their charitable status revoked.

Some of these charities,  Dying with Dignity, in particular are in a position where they often have to address political issues around their creed.

This doesn’t erode the importance of their work,  nor the good they do in the community.

But, instead of addressing points made (or ignoring them completely),  the Harper government has chosen to silence them with the threat of a CRA audit and review of their charitable status.

So,  a charity that seeks to help people (whether you believe in their ethos or not…that’s what they do),  gets shafted,  while right wing,  pro-conservative,  anti-people,  pro-business “think-tanks” like the Fraser Institute continue to enjoy their charitable status,  all the while trying to turn us in America North.

Again, intimidating the population with the goal of furthering one’s political goals.

These are very clear instances where Stephen Harper and the Conservative Party of Canada have engaged in terrorist acts as defined by the Criminal Code of Canada.

This also means,  that every advertisement,   every one of those campy, embarrassing 24/7 videos the CPC publishes,  and even every Action Plan Canada advert with the CPC logo prominently displayed is a violation of any law prohibiting, and criminalizing the promotion, or glorification of terrorism.

Do I think that Harper and his cronies are actual terrorists in the conventional sense?

Of course not.

While I disagree with their ideology and their politics,  I do not think they are driven by hate.  (I truly hope to never be proven wrong on that).

I think that they’re misguided and too beholden to the “party line” and “their base” to see sense and logic,  and bring their ideas into the 21st century.

I also think that they don’t really think about what they’re doing.

Maybe if they still had some researchers that haven’t been intimidated into towing the party line over in the Justice Department,    one of them would’ve pointed out that they themselves meet the Criminal Code definition of a terrorist.

Stupid things people have said to me about my mental health…..

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Today is #BellLetsTalk Day.

I’m really glad that a large corporation takes such an interest in mental health and promotes it in a positive way.

I figured, that today being about mental health that I would share some of the absolutely silly things people have said to me about my mental health….


“You can do it!  I believe in you!”

On the face of it,  you’d think this was not something incredibly stupid.

However,   the thing the speaker thought I could do was to stop being so absent-minded even though he knew I was bi-polar and have ADHD.

I should point out that he thought that Bi-Polar meant mood-swings…and didn’t feel the need to do any reading on the subject.

So, what he was essentially saying was that my disease, and its features,  were something I could overcome with hard work and discipline.

In other words my disease wasn’t a disease…but a character flaw.

Naturally,  when the features of my disease allowed me to do things that were superhuman (ADHD is like a superpower…I can focus completely on something and knock down problems in record time),  there was nary a complaint.

I’ll note that when a co-worker hurt his back and couldn’t do any heavy lifting,  this individual did not say to him, “Hey, I believe in you!  You can do it!  Go lift and carry heavy things!”


“Other people have it worse than you do.”

This was the response I got when I told someone that I was deeply depressed.

The hardest thing for me is to admit to someone else that I’m in trouble…..and stupidity like this is the reason why.

But,  on the bright side,  I discovered that getting really, really, really angry with someone is a good way to break the depressive cycle.



“If things are so bad,  why haven’t you killed yourself?”

Yes, someone actually said this to me.

I’m not sure what made him say this….when I questioned it,  he told me that he’d ‘read somewhere’ that depression and mental illness are just people crying out for help….and that if it was really bad they usually just killed themselves.

I pointed out to him that some “crazy people” make themselves feel better by beating the living shit out of someone who desperately needed it.

He then followed up by telling me that he disputed my inference that he actually desperately needed a beating.


“If you wouldn’t use such flowery words to describe how you feel,  you wouldn’t be so depressed!”

Yup….true story.

Apparently my mental health wasn’t the issue,  it was that I could, at times,  so poignantly describe my pain.

This is akin to saying that a sunset is less beautiful if you say, “Hey, nice sunset!”,  instead of saying,  “What a magnificent display of nature’s radiance!”.

This reinforces something I often say….”People are stupid.”

“Well, its probably because of  X.   Let’s review in detail…..”

While this isn’t a specific quote,  this is one of the situations that is the most maddening…..

The presumption that there something that caused the depression,  and it was likely my fault.

First off,   if I’m upset or worried about something,  I don’t need to rehash the cause.

Here’s a newsflash,  despite my mental health issues,  I’m smart…actually,  let’s be brutally honest here.

I’m really fucking smart!

I know when I fuck something up,  and I don’t need to re-hash the details…especially with the tone of “this is all your fault!”.

Especially….when whatever the individual thinks I screwed up,  I didn’t really screw up and has nothing to do with my current situation.

Conversations usually go like this:

“Hey, you always screw up your finances, is that it?


You always do this,  is that it?


Well you always do that?

Is that it?”


Of course,  when you’re throwing out ideas about how this is all my fault,  do you know what I’m thinking?

Its not

“Wow,  what a good friend!”

Its more like….

“What a fucking asshole.”


Let me close by telling you the best things I’ve heard from friends when things were bad….

…because you do matter.

You’re not alone,   we’ll get through this…I’m with you every step of the way!

/hug  What can I do to help?   Just listen?  Okay,  I’m here.

WOOF! WOOF!  [Tackle] [Face Lick]   

how my dog saved my life More

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