A long while back I blogged about meditating with cats.
I just re-read that and wow…how things have changed, and yet remain the same. I didn’t realize it until now, but the exact same situation that I was meditating on then was what was on my mind last night. Seriously….that faded away, but is now back and more promising. I still won’t say what it is…
Anyway, just over a month ago, I got a new dog….Kharma, a 5 year old Great Dane. I didn’t name her, and I suspect that her original owners wanted to say “Kharma’s a bitch”, because Kharma is female.
Kharma’s an alpha dog and quickly asserted herself as Queen of the house. I’m still the boss…make no mistake. Colorado defers to her…to the point where a friend came to visit on Friday night. I heard the dogs barking and recognized Colorado’s frantic “Take One More Step and I’ll Fucking Eat You!” bark. I went out to see what the issue was and saw Corey standing by the back gate, waving.
Kharma’s never met Corey, but Corey is one of Colorado’s favorite people (Corey is the only person who can walk her without me)….but Colorado took her cue from Kharma.
Anyway, I’m digressing again….
Last night, after Game of Thrones, and before sleep I sat on the bed and folded myself into my usual meditation position. I folded my hands (Wisdom and Compassion) and tried to drop into meditation space.
Kharma was in her usual place beside me. I felt Colorado jump on the bed, and then her wet nose probing my hands so I could pet her. I was going to push her away, but thought better of it, as I’ve often described petting her as a form of meditation…so I sought to include her.
Just as I was settling, I felt Kharma’s massive head drop onto my lap….she too wanted to be included. It worked for a bit, but then I felt an energetic pulse from Colorado.
Suddenly, she was sitting up right, her paws on my shoulders and licking my face. I tried to push her away, but she persisted.
I thought this unusual as I was in a good place….but Colorado has done this before.
I’ve noticed that Colorado is very much in-tune the rhythm and flow of my Bi-Polar fluctuations. Even before I realize I might be a bit off, I can tell from Colorado’s behavior if maybe I need to pay more attention to my brain and get things back on track.
I haven’t told many people this, but late last year I was in trouble. My mood slid downward, until one night, it hit bottom and I found myself in a dark place. I don’t recall that much about it…just random flashes and memories of thoughts.
It was to the point that I didn’t care if I ever came out of it…existence was pointless.
It was then that I realized how valuable a friend Colorado is to me. Suddenly I found myself pinned to the couch (literally…she came at me so hard that she knocked me over), paws on shoulders and licking my face frantically.
I pushed her off several times only to have her bounce back…..she only stopped when I started laughing….I got up, took my meds, gave my friend one of her favorite things in the world (raw steak) and called a human friend.
So, I’m not sure what brought on last night’s affection as I was in a good place. But then, this morning, I found out that my friend was admitted to hospital last night….so maybe I connected on that level and didn’t notice.
I said that when you have cats, if they deign to pay attention to you, that you are never alone, even if you want to be.
With dogs….you are never alone.